Last Updated on December 11, 2011
I watched a man stepping into the early stages of his work recently, and there is a realisation I shared with that man that I feel other men—men consciously on the path to liberation from the collective insanity we call “normality”—might benefit from reading about.
What I have observed and experienced in my own life, and the realisation that came whilst observing the work of another man, is this:
What appears to be an impossible situation; a catch-22 type dilemma; a no-way-out circumstance; call it what you may—is not simply calling out for “fixing” and resolution. Rather this sort of self-created phenomena is in fact calling out for a change of consciousness. The way in which I have woven my particular story of suffering and misery is in complete congruence with my Soul’s path to set me free.
The implications of this fact are that rigidly fixating on trying to find a solution or an immediate easy answer to my apparent dilemmais not what my work is all about. When a man comes back to a place of self-love, drops his judgement of himself and his apparent circumstances, and brings clear clean awareness into contact with the dilemmahe appears to be facing his situation is immediately transformed. This is the transformation from facing a painful and seemingly unsolvable dichotomy, to now facing the means and circumstances through which That which I AM is waking this man up to his glory, his authentic power, his love, and his omnipotent magnificence. What appeared to be a deeply personal battle for survival has now been transformed into a deeply impersonal experience of that which will wake this man up to his true self.
The warrior of old went to war. This war was about fighting and destroying that which was judged to be wrong or bad. The new warrior goes into loving conscious relationship. A relationship with that which is perhaps frightening, deadly to the ego/shadow self, and intimidating. Relationship with that which will—when approved rightly—will unveil that which has kept this man in a place of smallness, emotional poverty, false power, no power, destructiveness, and general suffering. This is a relationship that I would liken to the warrior that is going out on a hunt. When I go into war I am there to fight and destroy the life of a perceived enemy—this was the way of the old warrior. Yet as man going out on a hunt I am stepping out into the unknown elements of nature in order to form a relationship with my prey. Through this relationship I will get to know it’s ways. I will come to know it’s habits like where it sleeps, grazes, drinks, andwalks. I will come to know whether it has family and I will come to know it’s position within it’s “tribe”. I come to know all these things as I carefully and lovingly stalk it so that I might successfully capture this prey—now a friend that I honour and respect—and then receive the life that it embodies.
As you can see, I am sure, that warrior that goes out to stalk and hunt prey is a very different warrior from he who goes out to seek and destroy another man. Hunting, when approached in the way of our ancient ancestors, is a life-giving act of grace—of love in action.
What I would like to suggest is that my shadow—and your shadow—is in fact prey that is best approached like the wise hunter would approach it. In my experience, it is easy for a man to approach his pain, his struggles, and his shadows in a way that is much like going to war.
“I experience such pain when I am faced with this sort of situation in my relationship with my wife… It’s a real shadow behaviour for me… I want to root that fucker out and be free of this bullshit”.
Oh, how often have I heard a man talk about his work in this way, perhaps feeling that it’s a noble step for him to be so open about what’s going on for him.
Yet what I would like to gently and lovingly suggest is that this is the cry of an old warrior of war going into battle on the contemporary battlefield of his own inner psyche. I can not differentiate between this and the person I here saying
“I’ve got this cancer in my lung… I just want to get rid of this fucker… it’s eating me up and I don’t fucking like it. I feel scared and intimidated (by this enemy)”
The hunter will also feel some fear as he steps away from the familiar territory of his village and out into the wilderness. A wilderness that no matter how well he explores, it will always embody a strong presence of the unknown for him for it is always changing and forever full of surprises—for it is alive and evolving and growing all the time. Yet this fear will not bring about intimidation and the heartless desire to attack and destroy that a man going to war might feel as he steps out onto the battlefield. No, rather it will heighten his sense, centre him in his heart, and make his mind lucid withpenetrating awareness. In this heightened state he will go out on the hunt to receive more life.
When a man stalks his own shadows in this way he too is going out—or more “in” as the case may be—to hunt for more life. He is stepping inward to claim back that fragment of his own life—his own Soul—that he had previously lost and forgotten about. To approach this sort of inner work with a warring attitude is to potentially destroy the very Life that I am here to receive, reclaim, and reintegrate. I can not, of course, destroy life for God has created me as a Creator. Hence this Life—this fragment of my own Self that I am ultimately meant to reclaim—will simply jump ship and start expressing itself in the form of yet another shadow.
Let me give voice a word of warning though. Life is infinitely intelligent. Hence if I go to war with my shadow and destroy what appears to be its menacing form, then the life behind it and within it will find an increasingly formidable form to express itself through next time. Each time I am faced with the challenge of reclaiming this particular fragment of my own Soul the circumstance will get increasingly painful and increasingly challenging. The eventual outcome being that if I keep up this warring approach I will eventually find myself out there on the battlefield facing such a vast and powerful “enemy” that going to battle with it will no long be an option.
“This fucker will wipe you out no matter how bloody minded and powerful you think you are”.
When faced with such a formidable enemy I have two options. Either I go to war and die, or a retreat and reassess the situation. That reassessment—when carried out with intelligence and wisdom—will result in only ONE outcome. The natural outcomeis that I will have to drop my sword, my armour and my shield. I will pick up my bow and arrow, a bag of water, and a light rucksack, and step out into the jungle of my own interiority to meet this perceived opponent not as “enemy” to be destroyed, but as prey to be hunted. I will go into a loving relationship with it—and it must be a loving relationship. The only way the hunter truly gets to know his prey is by entering into this loving relationship, for it is only in that sacred space that he can truly meet his prey, connect with it, bond with it, and hence come to deeply know and understand it.
So this is why your shadow, your pain, and your suffering will continue to escalate when approached unconsciously. This is the mechanism by which Nature insures that every human will in fact one day wake up to approaching Life with deep love, reverence, and as a blessing presence.
May you quickly realise that each perceive shadow, dilemma, challenge, and painful circumstance you face is not there to be “got rid of”. Rather it is there to teach you and to grant you more Life—Life that you had previously given up in order to become more aware of what you are by experiencing what it means to lose it. Each trying situation is there to heal you. Each challenge and formidable situation is there to temper your spirit so that you might bring forth an even greater expression of your Magnificence. It’s not an enemy, rather it is one of your greatest allies.
With love and blessings,
Jonathan
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